Open Topic

You’ll Just Know.

If he likes you, he’s not just going to answer your texts.

He’s going to be the one sending the first one.

If he likes you, he’s not going to just be nice to you when you run into each other.

He’s going to show up where he is to see you and spend time with you.

If he likes you, he isn’t going to look at your snapchat first.

He’s going to be with you and you won’t care about looking at your phone.

If he likes you, he isn’t going to show you through likes on Instagram or Facebook.

He’s going to show the fuck up and tell this is how I feel and he won’t hold back.

I’m so tired of girls falling harder for guys as they try to create this narrative of someone caring when clearly they don’t. 

I don’t care if he says all the right things. The only thing I care about is what he’s doing to prove it.

When he likes you, you aren’t going to have to wonder if he does.

If he truly likes you, he isn’t going to play you or try to mess with your head.

If he likes you he isn’t going to make up excuses as to why he didn’t make it again. 

Instead, he is going to be there because you asked him to be.

Instead, he’s going to change his schedule so he doesn’t disappoint you.

If he likes you, you won’t have to remind him you exist by blowing up his news feed.

Snapping just to see if he looks at it. Posting on instagram just to see if he likes it.

If he likes you you’ll be on his mind without you having to do anything at all. 

Because when a guy truly likes you, he’s going to want to be with you and he’ll stop at nothing to make that happen.

If he likes you, he won’t wait hours to answer your text.

If he likes you, he won’t wait until the weekend to see you.

If he likes you, he won’t meet you for drinks. He’ll actually take you out to dinner.

If he likes you, you won’t have to think twice about it.

And if he doesn’t like you, that’s when you’ll be confused. That’s when you’ll read signs that aren’t there. That’s when you’ll try really hard for someone’s time and attention when in reality, you know you are wasting yours but you don’t want to believe it.

When a guy doesn’t like a girl, instead of walking away, she becomes naive. 

He doesn’t like you if he hurts you and he can live with it.

He doesn’t like you if he can cancel on you and not care about making it up to you.

He doesn’t like you if you show up at the same place and he isn’t looking over his shoulder for you as you are him.

He doesn’t like you if he ignores you.

He doesn’t like you if he’s playing with your emotions.

He doesn’t like you if he’s not straight up saying it.

He doesn’t like you if you can pour your heart out and he avoids it.

He doesn’t like you if he isn’t making a move.

He doesn’t like you if the relationship is solely based on something physical.

He doesn’t like you if his friends and family don’t know about you.

He doesn’t like you if he brings up some other girls name.

And you can analyze it as much as you please. You can tell me he’s trying to make you jealous.

Maybe he is.

If that’s the case, and you guys go back and forth with some fucked up game of cat and mouse, if he is trying to make you jealous, he doesn’t like you.

Because the right person won’t try to make you jealous. The right person will give you so much time and attention and love that everyone else will be jealous of you.

Don’t fall for someone just because he’s there and giving you a little TLC.

Fall for someone who overwhelms you with it that you don’t even have to question how he feels.

When a guy likes you you’ll know. When a guy doesn’t like you, you’ll know that too. 

I’ve been there. Loving hard thinking maybe one day he’ll change. Jumping through hoops hoping maybe he’ll notice. I lost myself loving people in ways I wanted them to love me. But if I could go back in time and tell my former self-anything, it would be to stop.

I think sometimes we don’t want to believe what we know in our heart to be true so we hang onto anything we can. But I also think sometimes we gravitate towards people we know don’t love us out of fear of one day finding someone who does. Because it’s only then when you find the right love you have something you can lose. So we stick to loving people who keep us at arm’s length because you can’t lose something that’s never been yours, and your heart can’t break when it’s already broken to begin with.



Open Topic

Ghost Of Your Past.

Relationships ending are never easy. Especially when you were in one with someone you thought would be your forever. That person you thought would be the one you’d say your vows to. That person you looked at and you didn’t just see the most beautiful person you’ve ever known, you saw your future.

Then somewhere in all that they stopped feeling the same way.

The words “it’s over” felt foreign to you. Bitter almost.

You still keep replaying it in your mind. You think back to how long it’s been and you are baffled by all of it.

Baffled, that time forced you to move on when you didn’t want to.
Baffled, that you had to learn how to fall out of love with someone the hard way, simply because they stopped loving you.
Baffled, because you didn’t think anyone could cause you this much pain.

Now you are tossing and turning and not sleeping through the night as they meet you in your dreams. You wake up in a cold sweat and realize that’s the closest you’ll ever get to them. They are the ghost of your past you wanted to be your future.

How easily they just walked away with the bits and pieces of your heart, they couldn’t even give back if they tried.

There are some people who touch your heart and change it in such a way you can’t take it back without seeing every bit of them there.

You try to move on but you see them in every corner. You see them on every turn you make and every street you drive down. You look towards your passenger seat and you remember when they were there and everything was good. You walk through your house and you pause for a moment thinking about when they were sitting on your couch, eating at your table, or laying in your bed.

Now your bed seems too big for one, and all you want to do is sleep. But you aren’t sleeping because you are tired, you are sleeping to escape that pain that still lives within you. When you wake up, they are still your first thought. When you go to bed, they are still the one you’re thinking of.

You look at your phone that hasn’t gone off in ages. You never knew silence could scream so loudly in a voice that’s now a memory.

And you know you have to move on but in every person you meet, you look for them as if finding them in someone else would lead you to find yourself again because you feel lost without them. 

But your life moves on, you begin to smile and laugh and live again. But there are still moments and days that hit you between the eyes where all of it comes flooding back to you.

You wonder do they miss you too? Are they thinking about you? Will they come back? Then another day without them begins and you are again forced to endure another day alone, reminding yourself this pain you feel shows that you’re alive but you still wonder how you’ve made it when the best person in your life is so far away