Open Topic

50 Things That Mean Something To Someone With Anxiety.

1. Answering texts and calls quickly.

2. Constant reassurance.

3. Phrases like “We are okay.”

4. Or “I’m not mad at you.”

5. “Everything will be fine.”

6. “I am here for you.”

7. Simply listening to what is going on in our head.

8. No matter how unrealistic it might be.

9. Show us you aren’t going to judge us as we let you in.

10. We push people away out of fear because we think we are annoying.

11. Being the confident one in the relationship.

12. Answering the questions and doubts we have.

13. Being completely honest.

14. Telling us when we’ve made a mistake.

15. Not letting silence teach us that.

16. Because we’ll come up with ten scenarios of our own.

17. Accepting the fact you might get more than one text.

18. Or really long ones.

19. Talking to us one on one in social settings.

20. Because social anxiety and groups make us cringe.

21. Knowing we care probably too much about what people think.

22. And if someone doesn’t like us, it kills us.

23. If you’re up, talk to us, chances are we’re awake too.

24. Listening to our irrational fears.

25. Building us up with words.

26. We’ll reread it often.

27. Because in our mind we are constantly tearing ourselves down.

28. Listening as we talk about the past we haven’t forgiven ourselves for.

29. Because we worry about the future and dwell in the past.

30. Being there for us after nights out.

31. Because we are so hard on ourselves after drinking.

32. Drunk us doesn’t have anxiety which we like.

33. Sober us panics about everything we might have said or done.

34. Accepting apologies even when they aren’t necessary.

35. Being there for us when we fail.

36. Because we are a perfectionist and our own worst critic.

37. Being observant of little things.

38. Twirling our hair. Picking skin. Excessive cleaning.

39. We do these things to keep our mind busy because we are worrying.

40. Understanding it isn’t our fault.

41. But we think it is.

42. But we are trying so hard to live with this thing peacefully.

43. Helping us make choices.

44. Because we are constantly doubting ourselves.

45. Telling us you aren’t going to leave is probably the best thing you can say.

46. Because we are convinced everyone is going to leave us.

47. Knowing how much we mean it when we say we love you.

48. Because in accepting us, you’ve taught us to accept ourselves.

49. And there isn’t anything we can do to show our appreciation or gratitude.

50. Even though we try, probably a little too hard sometimes. 

Open Topic

If You Didn’t Care…

If you didn’t care about her, you wouldn’t try to keep tabs on her. You wouldn’t be checking her stories first or blowing up her news feed. If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t be wondering who she’s with or bother to ask what’s she’s doing. 

If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t wait until you’re drunk just to text her. Because when you can’t be anything but honest, she’s the one you think of.

You wouldn’t wonder who she’s going home with or text her in the morning to figure out if she also woke up alone too.

If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t think of her when you’re with someone else. Because even if they are prettier or everything you could want, there’s something about her. She has something they don’t. And she’s always the one in the back of your mind.

If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t try to pull her in every time she tried to pull away. But you do.

If you didn’t care, she wouldn’t be on your radar remotely.

But she is. You play cat and mouse like it’s a game you both hate but won’t stop.

If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t keep trying to make some power move over her. You want to be the one who cares less.

Regardless of what you might say you’ve fallen for this girl.

Maybe she’s different. Maybe she’s not like the rest of them. Maybe she’s not your type at all. But there is something about her you can’t put your finger on. 

Other girls, you can read easily and play as you’d like to. But this girl not only doesn’t play games it’s because of that she’s the one making the rules. For the first time in your life, someone else is saying jump and you’re asking how high?

If you didn’t care how she felt, the things she does do wouldn’t affect you, but it does.

If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t flinch if you hurt her feelings.

But you find yourself apologizing more than you ever have in your life.

You find yourself trying really hard to impress her because she’s simplistically impressed you from the start.

She makes you want to be a better man than you are. She makes you want to make the right choices. She makes you want to be the person she built you up in your mind to be. And you fear the day she sees your true colors.

She’s changed you without having to do anything at all but be herself.

Maybe you don’t like her enough to do something yet, but you like her enough that she influences the choices you make.

You like her enough to try to get her attention.

If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t think of her when you see certain things. You wouldn’t look for reasons to talk to her. You wouldn’t ask questions you know answers to just to get her to talk.

If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t post snap stories or instagram stories hoping she’s the first to see it. And as you go through a list of people you don’t care for, it’s her name you’re looking for.

You wouldn’t show up at the places you know she’ll be at and every time you see someone you think it’s her, you feel your heart racing a little faster.

If you didn’t care, the guy she’s holding hands with wouldn’t bother you as much as it does but part of you wishes it was you.

If you didn’t care, you wouldn’t feel those things at all.

It’s the nights you’re alone and you don’t know where she is and she’s not answering and it’s bothering you more than you’d like to admit.

It’s the nights you aren’t alone and you look at a stranger who doesn’t do it for you.

It’s the moment you blow up her phone just to remind her you’re still there, in case she’s forgotten.

Because you care. You don’t want to. But the heart wants what it wants and no matter what you say or do she can feel it too.

If you didn’t care, she wouldn’t be the last person you think of at night. But you do.

She knows you care or you wouldn’t be jealous and the only reason she knows this, is because she has her moments of jealousy too.